POPCORN CINEMA

THE NOTES OF A DIRTY YOUNG MEXICAN ARE BACK. WE ARE SORRY IF WE CAUSE YOU ANY INCONVINIENCE, BUT WE WHERE WORKING HARDLY ON CONSTRUCTIONS, CONVINIENCE STORES, VINEYARDS, KITCHENS, BUSES, ETC... THIS NEW EPISODE SHOWS THE LUCK OF OUR DEAR ILLEGAL ALIEN TRYING TO GET INTO THE FILM INDUSTRY. ENJOY AND HOPE TO HAVE YOUR BEAUTIFUL EYES IN THE NOTES OF THIS DIRTY CREATURE.

Popcorn cinema

1. YELLOW PAGES.
There are some methods to achieve goals; I’m not pretty sure about what the fuck I’m doing here. So finally I tried to get rid of my identity, and now it’s time to search for the golden opportunity. There’s a lot of free stuff in this town, and that is terrific, I got my blanket pack for free, more than four free newspapers, and with the ones that costs that they dropt them in the night I can make a pretty comfortable pillow.
2. THE MORNING
I woke up and find out that I’m still drooling the pillows,; however a message from some of the powerful forces from above send me a message, and in that moment I start remembering my dreams, once on my little pueblito, the cinema came to us, it was a trailer with a lot of big speakers and a huge screen, I was amazed by that and I realized that I want to be a movie star, that is quite predictable, probably one of the commonest dreams anywhere, but it was my dream and after all the bad things happened and beer bottles , chicks, several parties crossed my path vanished all my expectations to became a movie star. And so, I was astonished reading that signal, the people that was crossing the street next to my bedroom, the porch of an abandoned book store, look at me as if I were enlighted, and I was definitely impressed with something that can probably change the course of my life: “MOVIE CASTING”. Here I go. Filling the application was certainly a huge problem, because I was lack of identity, but let’s start again, we can fake, however the only thing they want is you to pay taxes, am I right?
3. SOLIDARITY
I decide to take the subway and visit some “good fellas” at the mission, to get a Social Security Fake number, and then I arrive with anything but my huge presence, looking like the bum I am and hoping that some good compatriots will help me. A picturesque character was standing up in front of a trash can, that is probably a symbol, but I wasn’t analyzing any thing so I decide to talk to him:
- Hey man, what’s up?
- Hablas español
- Si compadre, que necesitas (I’m going to switch to English but just want to let you know that the conversation was in Spanish)
- Well I need… you know
- I know what ese.
- Well you know, the thing
- What thing compadre? Talk to me clearly
- Mmm… well, I need some help
- What kind of help, you fucking beaners are so complicated
- And what the fuck you are?
- I’m a legal citizen you motherfucker, not like you, look at you, you scum
- Fuck you, fucking pocho, you are not even an american you are nothing an orphan of the world
- Well at least I have papers
- Go and stick up in your ass
- Chinga tu madre
- Chinga la tuya

4. ZEITGEIST
And then, I was upset, nothing of nothing. So I decide to get into an office of social assistance, probably I could get some help there, they will ask me for money but all I can offer is a huge smile. And I crossed the door:
- Buenas tardes (then again I’ll switch to English because this dialogue was also in Spanish)
- Good afternoon lady
- What can I do for you?
- Well, I have a problem
- Tell me
- I want to apply for a job but I don’t have papers
- That is certainly a problem, but isn’t anything we can solve. In that moment the bars and the stars where shining for me.
- Really?
- Really
- Well, look I found on this newspaper, this add, check it
- All right… so, you have skills as an actor
- Yes I do
- Really? Tell me what have you done so far
- Well, I used to be a huge TV star on my small community, I perform big rolls, such as pancho villa, in the revenge of moctezuma, and also I perform Pito Perez in our adaptation of moby dick, and as you can tell I’m certainly a talent, don’t you think so? In that peaceful moment the lady got seduced by my gorgeous moustache and my brown teeth
- All right, fantastic, it’s an honor to meet you Mr.?
- Xavier Gonzalez Casanova
- Mr. Gonzalez Casanova, welcome to America. The black door of my cave was opening slowly, spreading rays of light with that celestial postmodern music from L.A. and a brunette pin up dolly from the 50’s who was paraphrasing the Venus of Milo wink me with sutil guitar strings.
- Thank you.
After that she made me a SSN and helps me filling the application for the casting call. I was ready.

5. THE GOODWILL
I was needing clothes, and a bath, charity is definitely a liberal hobby, so, I use the information from the social assistance office and I remind me as the principal character from Ricardo’s Benett : “news from afar”, I got there, and I was picking up the look to impress and seduce this people, of course I was gonna succeed, my taste it’s something they have never seen before. There was a mountain of clothes, all the homeless where picking up the hodies and the jackets, but that was not my situation, I didn’t need any of those, so was idealizing myself and I remember from my experience that the fashionable look in my land it’s to look like Luis Miguel, obviously I wasn’t going to find clothes like that in that trash can, but there was some clothes in a box from an old lady from pacific heights, and inside there was several things that can be useful to surprise the people on that production company. I took some old style silk blouses with some tropical design, a pair of dark jeans that really fit on me and part of a set of fake jewelry accessories. Then I look at myself in the mirror, with that gorgeous brown skin, that fake gold chain, my tropical blouse the black fitted jeans, Oh my god, I was looking like a Spanish pop character from the 80’s. What the fuck, they will find that cool, let’s see what’s going on.

6. THE MOP
There I was, a huge black gate in front of me, a good looking man with a filled application and nothing to loose, I rang the bell a speaker talks to me:
- Yes?
- I’m here for the casting call
- Ha ha… yeah right, well try it
- Thanks
The hall smells like fame and glory and an innocent man was walking there to turn into the biggest menace of Hollywood. And then I arrive to a lobby:
- Good morning, who are you looking for?
- Well, I came here for the casting call
- Ha ha… yeah right, well, they are interviewing people right now, do you want to pass
- Oh yes, please, here is my application
- Ok…. Mr. Xavier, hold on let me announce you
- Thank yous
I was starting to sweat, shit all my fancy outfit with my lady perfume smell and my crazy jewelry was going to be ruined.
- Go on

And I cross another door, there was a camera man and a fancy guy sitting down in a chair, in front of them a guy with a French hat a fat woman with a notebook and a skinny guy with a shirt of black and white bars.
- So, you sound terrific for the roll, one last question, what is your ethnicity
- Thank you, well, I’m part Irish, part Ukrainian, part German and a little bit of Spaniard.
- Fantastic, we will call you back.
- Oh! Thank you guys
In the moment he was standing up a guy approach me.
- Finally you are here, where the fuck you where? You are late again Pedro, take the mop an clean the stage 2 right now
- Oh, sorry, I’m not Pedro, I came here for the casting call
- Ha ha… yeah right, I’m sorry, try it, this is a free country
- Oh well, thank you sir.
- So, who is next. A loud voice nearby the stage sounds
- Well, me.
- And you are?
- Xavier Gonzalez Casanova
- Come in and sit down
- Thank you. The lights where in front of my eyes, I was shining and they where enchanted
- What do you think clara?
- This is hilarious Tom
- Yes it is, well, lets have fun; so? Mr. Gonzalez, tell me about yourself
- Well I was burn in zacatembaro Huxilac, a little town nearby the gulf of Guadalupe, as you know in the american Mediterranean
- Oh! Yes, I have been there several times, nice place, a little bit dirty but nice anyway
- Anyway, and I just came here, because I have been always into acting.
- Really? Tell me about your experience as an actor
- Well… probably you remember me for films as “Amores Perros”
- Oh! Yes, I love that film, tell me which roll you where playing there
- Oh! Well, I was one of the friends during the gang fight, the third on the second line at the background
- Really?? Well at least you have been working on serious productions
- Oh yes, and I have also been on the stage several times
- Really?? Which rolls?
- Oh! Well, eustaquio Lecumberry in “The death of the general Barrabas” and Sigfrido HIchombro in “The lord of Chalma”
- Fantastic, some of my favorite characters of the Mexican literature
- Really?? They are some of my favorites too. Then the silence break into the room
- Okay Xavier, I’m not going to make this longer, I hope you know what are we doing here
- Movies, right?
- Yes, but do you know what kind of movies?
- Well I bet quality films
- In certain way
- Okay?
- Xavier, are you familiar with the adult entertainment
- You mean adult entertainment
- Come on Xavier, don’t be naïf. You know exactly what I mean
- Oh, okay, I know exactly what you mean
- And this isn’t a conventional adult film
- Really, what is involved in? Animals?
- No Xavier, we hadn’t get that far, this is adult entertainment for gay people. In that moment I remind my grandma telling me when I was little, everything is allowed here, even the scandals, but if you turn into a faggot, I swear I will take out from the grave your grandfather and make him make you man, all right you little scum?
- Well, I think I’m not interested, but thank you for the coffee.
- Xavier, and what would you say if I pay you EIGHT THOUSAND DOLLARS. Holly shit, in that moment I start to loose all my scruples, I sit down again.
- Really?
- You have my word
- Can you tell me a little bit about the story?
- Well, telling stories in porn films was a fashion during the seventies and eighties, the trends of today belongs to a new genre called “reality”; we don’t need a story, just information that looks realistic. And in our chase you are a illegal worker, that you are certainly not y, who arrives to an office to ask for a job, and when they ask you for papers you will just act like yourself telling that you are illegal, and so your employer, who is a huge american guy will start fucking your ass, what do you think about it?
The cruelest situation is that that was a metaphor of my reality.
- Oh, It sounds great but isn’t part of my interests.
- Think about it, I know that you guys are religious and stuff, there’s nothing to be afraid, as time change we turn into the educators of society, we teach sexual health to the youth, we the pornographers are dedicated to the people in solitude, making pedagogy on each film, making your experience better, and you, our talent, can be considered as “the saints”, on the fifth teen century there was a guy named Alban Butler, who wrote the “the life of saints” named by the historians as the hagiography, many of those where sinners who turn into enlighted people, by scarifying their pleasures. In this chase you are making religion dear. How? Doing as a duty what you do for pleasure in this life, and as the time goes by, your mind will be free the last thing you will think about it’s going to be in sex, you will sacrifice for the people In solitude, and then you will be part of my hagiography.
I stand up and left the studio. The pornographer was jelling at me
- That’s why you don’t progress, because you are still attached to a moral that doesn’t exists anymore, return to your shitty movies, you fucking wet back!
7- POPCORN CINEMA
(Translated from the Spanish)
Dear mom:
Guess what? I finally got a job. That is great isn’t it? Well let me tell you the story, as you know I love to socialize and make friends all the time, we where on a party the other day and a gut told me that they where searching for talent in a casting agency. I decide to take my risks and I went there, obviously before that I went to a fancy store to get some clothes and a bottle of lotion. Everything was terrific by that time, I need to cancel the same day three appointment for people who wants me to work at their place as an employ, but definitely I came here to show my executive skills. Anyway mom, the thing is that I arrive to this agency and they interview me, they where enchanted by my beautiful accent and my great smile, but guess what, I deny the job, because it was a small roll, and I need to sell myself higher because I know that if I don’t do that they will use me for that kind of rolls. But there’s some good news mommy, after that a friend told me, that they where looking for people to work at a movie theater and I went there, they offer me this job selling popcorn, apparently there’s going to be opportunities to grow up inside the company and probably I can turn into the floor manager, which is terrific, and you never know, probably some Hollywood agent can come to the theater and get seduced by me.
Anyway mom, I hope you are doing great, don’t write me to this address because this is the address of the movie theater, I’ll send you my new address soon.
May god bless you mom.
Sincerely yours, the homesick Alien.

  

NOTES OF A DIRTY YOUNG MEXICAN

NOTES OF  A DIRTY YOUNG MEXICAN

The reason this blog isn't in spanish that is obviously my first language it's because this is an exercise to try to achieve an own style.  

This journal, is about the interaction of this "Evil Illegal Alien" with the region called bay area.   His stories, passions, daydreams, wishes, desires and all kind of experiences will be posted on this blog.

Inspired in Charles Bukowsky's "notes of a dirty old man" this:  "notes of a dirty young mexican", will try to give a new and fresh vision about America for the locals and outsiders.  Based on the surreal everyday walk of this unidentified suspect who lands in this territory.  

1. Recognition.  

¨By walking one makes the road,

and upon glancing behind one sees the path

that never will be trod again.

Wanderer, there is no road, only wakes upon the sea"

 - Antonio Machado -

Falling, is always related with freedom, the word itself is a poetic license.  But it can also be harsh, more when you are not ready for it.  Landing, the last part of falling is not pleasant when you have no idea what kind of surface is waiting for you.  We know about the character of our people but  they never teach us in the school how is the character of other societies.  When you are used to be treated gently, warmly, softly, you never expected the opposite.  THE SURPRISE FACTOR turns into your everyday and so, you are here, in the middle of nowhere (the land of the opportunity) in the hysteria of adaptation, searching for change in your pockets to buy something to drink and realizing that your only single possession is the dust in your nails.

NOTES OF A DIRTY YOUNG MEXICAN

journal of an illegal alien

2.  Looking for a job

Berkeley California, monday morning.  My bed spits me, taking me directly to the streets.  I walk and walk for more than two hours, in any direction, with any recommendation, just trying to find it by myself.  I believe in coincidences, so, probably there is a work waiting for me, somewhere.   But, hold on. What work do you really know? well, I can figure out that on the road.

"If you just give me a chance" "if you let me try" "I promess I will never dissapointed you, you can have my word" "Social Security Number, yes, I have one" "no, I don't have kids and wife" Just standing up, in front of all this miserable employers, that they know my condition, they know what I do, for how much and for how long, it looks that is an easy thing to get here, to find a job, but  is that really what I want.  Being a clerk? a janitor? a maid? the assistant of an assistant? the toilet itself? suck some caucasian dicks for an illegal job which means an illegal salary that will make me able to share my life in the floor of a living room  with other ten happy, committed, SOLD compatriots.  Fuck that, If I'm already an illegal alien, let's make it real, let's make it illegal.

3. Tracking the business.

The progress and order of this nation, it's based on the public trust, that it is something like the collective hypocrisy, inherited from generation to generation, that consists basically in the acceptation of the capitalist phenomenon (what this dirty illegal alien it's talking about? I know, let me keep on), the obvious things and of course, the dark side.  The dark side, I don't have anything against  the darkness, everything has it,  we need it, it gives us balance, but the problem is when we manipulate its naturally and turn it into the opposite giving to it moral values that doesn't belongs to it. And I'm  afraid that we knew that and we have been tricking ourselves from a long long time ago...   whatever (ha ha ha), who needs to know that?  we are not able to do anything anyway. And so, the machine works in that way and below the worms there's other worms the ones who really move the earth, making everything possible.  It's awesome to know that now that I'm getting into this I'm in the same ethos level than dirty business men and politicians.   But, what I'm gonna do?

The easiest way to reach minor criminals, it's easy, we have seen them in our hollywood education, they stand up in front of a high school, leaning  over a street light or a pay phone, with the big baggy pants the rastas and probably a cigarrete, black glasses, etc.   But... what can I do for them? well, as I told before, I WILL FIGURE OUT! 

My pants are not too baggy, well, they are not baggy at all, second, this big sombrero (hat), is seriously big, my shoes, oh my god I'm wearing huaraches (sandals), and my nationalist poncho (red, green and  white) it shows obviously that I'm not from here.  Now, pay attention if you want to succeed in this lands, the first step:  get rid of your sombrero, switch it for a paliacate (bandanna) or a beanie (no, has anything to do with beans, don't get confused) and put it in your head, then, take out all your  white cotton clothes, and go to a god will store, change it for some old baggy jeans, the same thing with the shirt, change the poncho for a hoodie (hooded sweatshirt) and finally....  the huaraches (sandals) for some retro michael jordan nike shoes.  

4.  The rehearsal.  

The mirror, shows exactly what we apparently are, our quotidian aspect or our disguises? anyway...   You look now at yourself in front of the mirror and you can see a complete new character, different from the one you saw today in the morning, no more sombrero, no more huaraches, just another western garbage, standing up with a pimp-bum attitude looking for the next bitch to exploit. Ha ha, yeah bra! whatzza bra?? aight! aight! you need to rehearsal more than twice, so you can get the perfect tune.   this is hella tight bra, fasha bra, aight, aight, yo- yo.   Now you make part of the official marginalized social class, trying to play the game but without sombrero.

The street looks at you, not like earlier, when your curious attitude was more than evident.  Mexican curious no more! you are the owner of your destiny and your confidence is going to take you exactly where you want to go. You can tell there is some kids hanging out in front of the bus stop, they seems to be as cool as you, it's time to make the beaner a winner!

Alien:  Hey bra's whatzza? 

human 1: Who is this nigga?

human 2:   What the hell I know

Alien: Hella tight bra! (beaner)

human 2: What the fuck is he saying?

Alien: Fasha bra! (beaner)

human 2: Aight, let's stop with this shit, who are you?

Alien: My name is.   (I need to think about a name, I can't say I'm an unidentified illegal alien).   I'm PJ Perez 

human 1:  Aight, you have a tight name.  where are you from?

Alien: (Where I'm from? a cool place for them) I'm from Tijuana Mexico bra. 

human 1:  Tight, tight, so... you must like dope aight?

Alien:  Oh, yes.... fasha!!! (beaner)

human 2: Shut the fuck off, this nigga is hella funny, so.. do you like skateboarding?

Alien: Oh yes, I'm very good skating.

Take the skate, put your feet on the ground, look at the horizon, feel the wind blowing into your head, be ready!  In the moment you put your feet on the skateboard you fall down, all the kids are laughing at you, and you stand up and decide to try again, you look ridicously trying to do something you have never do before, you pose trying to copy your skateboarding references such as bart simpson and dennis the menace, stretching your arms, making grimaces and jelling the classical teenage mutant ninja turtles's: "cowabunga"

human 2: This fool is  sucka.

human1: yeh, let's take his money.

After your hilarious show, you approach your new friends, happy to be member of THE GANG.  

Alien: So... do  you have marihuana? I'm hella tired.

Human 1: I bet bra, you were hella good bra.

Alien: (winking to them) well, you know, what you have, is what you have to give away

Human 2: This fool is funny thou.

Human 1: So. How much do you want?

Alien: Well, I was trying to start the business, you know.

Human 1: You are trying to sell dope?

Alien: Fucking yes!

Human 1: Are you sure? 

Ålien: Yeah, yeah.

Human 1: This nigga is hella crazy.

Human 2: Hey bra, let him do whatever he wants, if he wants to sell weed, let him sell weed, aight?

Human 1: aight bra.  So, mexican, how much do you want?

Alien: A hundred (that is all my saves that I bring with me from mexico)

Human 2: This nigga is a fool... 

Human 1: Aight, aight, give it to me, and wait for us, aight, don't move from here

You are witnessing  how some strangers make fun of you, fool you and take all your money you brought to survive.  Standing up in front of the bus stop, the beats from some marginalized rap tune are sounding loud in  your head while the sun set.  it's time to return to your place.

Story moral: "The one who hangs out with wolves, to scream is taught"